Thursday, January 19, 2012

A Note About Peanut Butter

From this post you may deduce "one" has a lot of peanut butter.  Like, a lot a lot.  It's been almost a year and I think we've managed to whittle down....3 of the 10 kg tub of Skippy Smooth that's sitting on my floor. (Friends in restaurants, what?)  From that experience I can assure you, thorough research has been done, experiments baked, boredom temporarily staved off... you get it.  And so I bring you,

THINGS TO DO WITH PEANUT BUTTER (Vol. 1):
  • Introduce to jam
  • Invite honey and bananas
  • Murder them with your mouth
  • Make a new sandwich
  • Make a valentine
  • Make dinosaur
  • Make a painting
  • Make a mess
  • Eat said mess
  • Invite others to eat said mess
  • Give it away
  • Write threatening letters to Reeses' to expose their secret recipe.  (add chocolate)
  • Paint a picture
  • Paint the wall
  • Paint yourself a.k.a. Invent PB&J tattoos
  • Make another sandwich

…Poison the remainder with hair product so you stop fucking eating it.